Green Khmers #4: Lords of Monies - For the Glory AAR

Hoya what's good long time no see! :D I've had a gud weekend, spent a lot of time modding FtG, what about you?

For now, WE BACK to Khmer. What you can see on the picture is diplomatic relations map. Self-explanatory. Hindu countries generally dislike us, since we've annexed their religious brethren in Champa long time ago. Now Muslims will dislike us, for we've just DoWed Malacca and we gon eradicate them.

It may be a formality, but it's a great day for we'll finally achieve what I call "acceptable income".

Yay! Moniebags! :D

Oh snap watch out, Malacca has a historical leader! Hang Jebat, you can see his stats on the screen. 3/3/3 is nothing impressive really.

Guess what, we still lose! But whatever, for they have no real chance of surviving the onslaught.

We beat them second try, lay siege to Malacca, and catch Hang Jebat in Perak. He tried to resist us, and well, he's dead now!

So good advice - don't resist the Khmers! Embrace The Green Buddha!

You better be embracing him now or else...

See the little ship on our topbar with 4 next to it? It's our colonists. Apparently we get 0.40 colonists per year now.

Great...

But it plays into my plans. See, there are some empty colonizable provinces in Indonesia. And they're damn rich! Spices and Coffee, nothing to complain about.

While provinces in Moluccas (Sulawesi and Manado) have really aggresive natives, we can try creating trading posts in Flores and Sumbawa.

Wait what trading posts?!

Yes, well...it's a cheap way to claim land in EU2. Trading posts don't cost much, don't generate much - if any - income bar producing province's resource (which boosts local Centre of Trade). They can also be burned by our enemies should they land there. But! They're really cheap, and they'll claim that land for us before Europeans arrive. It's a gud investment, if I do say so myself.

Meanwhile in Indochina rebels rear their ugly head in Da Lat, and guess what, NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN.

ALWAYS NEIN.

SOD OFF!!!!!!

So we get a trading post in Sumbawa, noice. Flores will be colonized, ekhm, trade-postinged soon enough!

At the same time wonderfully rich Malacca falls to our armies. Sultan escapes to Atjeh and we enter their city. Couldn't care less about locals or even Sunnis - all we want is their trade money! So we let them be, for now.

As you can see we're at war with Bantem still, but they sign white peace the next day, seeing there's nothing to gain or lose from this war.

Look at the income! Instantly went up from 11$ to 17$ per month. This is huge. Not only Malacca has nice base tax and decent production, but they have Center of Trade. While we don't trade ourselves, we get 3$ yearly per every foreign merchant in our CoT.

Most of the time CoT is full, which means 20 slots, which means additional 60$ a year. Now that's some real moniebags!

Thus Kaisers of Khmers have embraced another title, "Sacred Lord of All-Monies".

WE'RE RICH AHAHAHAHA BABY I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN.

Not happy about that event though. I'd love to settle dispute, it's +1 stab, but we don't have money to pay for this option. And that would mean taking a loan from Paradox Bank.

I'd rather not do that if I don't have to.

Oh look, a good event for once! What are monarch stats good for?

Administrative (ADM) is mostly good for colonization and converting provinces.

Diplomatic (DIP) gets us more diplomats per year and makes badboy decrease faster.

Military (MIL) affects our morale, above 5 we get bonus, below 5 we get penalty.

There are some other minor boons like additional monthly tech investment but whatever!

Da Lat revolts again and guess what they destroy us again :/

GOOD LUCK HAVE FUN

I AIN'T INTO THAT SHIT

But Ming gets scary. They're constantly at war now, and also allied Burma. Uncertain times...

Now this random is questionable. We get 100$ yes, but -1BTV will eventually outweight it in like a decade...

I usually take the monies anyway. Whatever!

Also in history log you can see Arakan gets away from China with mere 10$. AI sometimes signs stupid peace deals like this. Sometimes you can even sign WP with them day 1 after war declaration.

Look, it's still a great game alright?! At least truces are only 5 years long!

Another xxx9, another DP change. We pursue Quality in order to overcome Square Bitch one day.

One day, which is probably not going to come anytime soon. But we're making progress!

Another Boundary Dispute, this time I have some monies, so we pay some and get nice free stability.

Well...good....I guess...moving on!

Fuck me sideways!

Mon and Korea - two potential targets - protected by China. Also Burma, and I have no intention attacking them for now - attrition would destroy us.

Guess it's time to stay silent and avoid any troubles...

We try to make some diplomatic efforts, but allies are nowhere to be seen. We strike Royal Marriage with lords of Lanka though.

That's...something.

OKAY LOOK I HAD ENOUGH

LAN NA YER PISSING ME OFF

THAT I HAVE NO CB WHATEVER I CAN SUFFER THE STAB

BEGONE THOT!

China, in response to our aggresive act of war, has decided to guarantee our independence.

And Mu Bang, Lan Na's ally didn't even join the war.

Nice!

Okay I see where this is going - let the shitfuckery commence!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHH

Well yes we get 0 again, but we can recover from this I'm certain we have numerical advantage one phase lasts five days surely next time we'll get a better ro...

LAN NAAAAAAA
STOOOOOOOP

I cannae even do the thing :(

Baby it's another nine. I'm in tears.

How are they doing this.

We have their homeland locked down, but they almost have Mekong and this will only extend the war for no reason...

Good lord why is this happening?!

Not only we lose to amazing rolls, they also capture the fortress on the next day.

Classic stuff!

Eventually we just bleed them our, Soviet-style. Not proud of this, but that's what it is.

Early game warfare is too random. I have to rectify this.

While we siege all and every fort flying Lan Na flag, China makes quick work of Fake Viet and retakes Hanoi.

While Da Nang would be piss-easy to take now, we don't want third religion in our country. With our luck, rebels would be winning constantly :|

Whatchagonnado? Just leave them be.

Took altogether way too long, but we're almost there now.

All valuables and provinces are taken with extreme prejudice. I really don't want to bother myself with vassalization and diploannex, so we'll come back to annex the rest later.

This concludes fourth episode of Green Khmers! Aside of shitiest luck ever. I hope ye have enjoyeth yer time spent here!

Still have plenty of screenshots until 1559, I'm taking a break now, thinking about what to do next. Time is not eternal so I have to plan my next actions carefully.

See you next time! :)