Chavchuveny! A Siberian AAR Part 17

Author: Blorktronics
Published: 2017-02-01

Part of the campaign:

Chavchuveny! A Siberian AAR

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Game: Europa Universalis IV

Chavchuveny! A Siberian AAR Part 16

Images: 33, author: Blorktronics, published: 2017-02-01

Welcome back to Chavchuveny! A Siberian AAR Part 17!
Welcome welcome welcome! Roll up for the second half of the match of the century! The brave, plucky and independent Chavchuveny versus the mean, burly imperialist Russia. In the first half Russia got a serious beat down by the natives, but will glorious Chavchuveny's luck run out?

Apparently not! We start the match out with a lucky stability increase! Apparently the people are pleased by the glorious management of our mighty struggle and feel more stable. Brilliant! Now the put the Russians on the run!
Fresh clay is conquered!
We take to the offensive and seize the Russian colony of Angara. Glorious Chavchuveny shows no mercy to these imperialist scum! Farms a burned, villages razed. Already a slow trickle of despondent refugees flows from the hinterlands back to Moscow, each with their own tale of woe against the glorious Chavchuvenian empire.
Cleaning house...
As more clay is taken we prepare for another offensive against the remnants of Russian military might. These drafted conscripts are no match against the might of Chavchuveny! Our morale is hugely increased through religious conviction, fine military traditions, our sound military ideas and the sheer glory of our empire. To battle!
We send these weak and feeble peasants fleeing with their trousers around their ankles. Glorious!
Attrition? What attrition?
20,000 men roaming around enemy territory in the deepest darkest winter of Siberia and we only take 3.5% attrition, marvellous! Our attrition focused ideas are going to carry us all the way to Moscow! Chavchuvenians are a hardy bunch that need little to subsist on. We feed on iron and steel and drink the terror of our victims!
More threats arrive!
The feeble king of Russia won the crown of Denmark and has coerced the Danish military to muster all the way to Siberia. They have marched to their doom, quite literally because they seem set on marching into our larger armies. Doom!
Doom I say!
Look at that morale difference! The cowardly Danish don't stand a chance!
Glory to Chavchuveny!
Unfortunately, without our glorious general Tymancha busy on another front we had to rely on weak and puny Aiaan Vankho, who was unable to utterly destroy our hated foe. Nevertheless they won't be back to pester us for a long time. Press the advance!
Um...about that navy
Portugal must have missed the memo about the war and never showed up, so we mothball Chavchuveny's Armada and funnel the money into the army. It's a sad day for our navy, naval officers still remember with fondness those days of yore when the only thing keeping our fair and feeble lands safe from Japanese aggression were the few brave oarsmen who commanded our galley fleet. How times have changed...
Russia returns!
The problem with Russia is they can take a punch and come back fighting. Several punches in fact. Their new 50,000 men army threatens to utterly destroy our siege stacks! We must defend the frontier!
Tactics, Chavchuveny has them!
After a few forced marches we position our reserves and are ready to strike at the beast. Glory to Chavchuveny!
Attack! Glory! Triumph! More glory!
The brave men of Chavchuveny descend from all corners of the map to smite the treacherous Russians and drive another nail into the coffin of their ambitions. Victory will be ours!
Glorious victory at that! That's better than a 3:1 casualty ratio. As we army marches over the broken remains of their encampments we almost feel sorry for the poor peasants being marched to their deaths against us. Almost.
The state of the army
Despite repeated thrashings, Russia still can field 80,000 troops against us. Ghastly! However they have no manpower whatsoever and are being forced to rely on mercenaries.

Chavchveny, on the other hand, needs not resort to such low practices as our manpower pool is still plentiful and our armies full to the brim with furious patriots and reindeer.
More lambs to the slaughter!
As our advance reaches Europe itself we encounter armies from all nations rallied to stand against us. Their attempts are in vain!
Get out of my land!
Not even the presence of their king could prevent the destruction that unfolded. Glorious!
More destruction!
Russia, in her haste to conscript more troops and not anticipating the speed of our advance, left these feeble recruits without a general. What unfolded was more like sport than a real fight.
More battles! More glory!
It's not just native Russians feeling the effects of our invasion. The remnants of the Danish army had not time to recover from the previous battle. With their infantry depleted and their artillery exposed, they didn't stand a chance.
If there wasn't a prestige cap we'd be at, like, a thousand prestige right now from all these battles. Glorious!
Terrible news! The nation mourns!
The sad and premature death of our mighty king causes the nation to weep in sorrow, but his son and heir Yrgel has bravely taken up the dead king's cause. Truth be told, Yrgel is more of a lover than a fighter, but in Chavchuveny everybody must fight!
The swarm will devour you!
Why assault 1,000 garrison forts when you can just eat the attrition and laugh? We begin the carpet siege of Russia! Glory to Chavchuveny!
The front line advances...
What's that you say? 30,000 troops with no leader? Well, don't mind if I do..
Om nom nom
The battle of Izhevk will go down as one of the most one-sided battles in Chavchuvenian history. And believe me, we've fought a lot of one-sided battles.
An army update
Russia has fallen out of the top leagues with a puny 40,000 men under arms. The final fate awaits them and nothing can stand in our way!
The war overview
Despite having annihilated anything that stands against us, international observers claim we are 'losing' the war! Ridiculous! It is only a matter of time until Moscow falls! Also the Russian numbers are heavily skewed by Portuguese colonial nations which refuse to lift a finger to help. Good!
More glory!
The Russian leadership appears to have gone on vacation and left their peasant conscripts to their fate...
Well, Russia had 40,000 men under arms and now they have 20,000. Meanwhile we have about 150,000 so good luck Russia you're going to need it!
Painting the map white
The state of the war so far! We are sweeping over Siberia like a tidal wave! The trickle of refugees has turned into a flood. The streets of Moscow churns with the desolate faces of broken refugees. Bread riots have broken out and the Tsar has to impose martial law in his own capital to keep order. A frenzied panic grips the Russian people as they desperately hope for something to stop the dread advance of Chavchuveny...
The dread advance of Chavchuveny continues! Moscow falls!
With nothing to stop us, Erkin Tymancha marches 60,000 men to the gates of Moscow and assaults their fortifications. After mere days of fighting the city falls and the Russian war effort collapses. We are true to our word and burn their wretched city to the ground! Mere decades ago such an act was unthinkable and Chavchuveny's threats were openly mocked and laughed at! Well look at us now, a dread inferno ravaging the once-great and mighty Russia. Glory to Chavchuveny!
Russia enters its twilight phase
The Russian Tsar fled the capital ahead of Chavchuveny's advance and continues the war effort. But it is in vain. Chavchuveny's armies swarm over every corner of the Russian heartland as Europe looks on with shock and awe at the reversal of Russia's fortunes.
Fighting to the last man
Credit given where credit is due, Russia didn't give up without a fight. Even with only one province not being seized they still desperately raise troops to fight against the horde. It is all in vain. The Tsar sends emissaries to King Yrgel seeking terms of surrender.
This is the deal. Pray we do not alter it further...
The war aims were initially to take Siberia and push Russia back to the Urals. But on second thoughts we'll take what we can get. We will take everything from Russia. Everything!
Aggressive expansion? What aggressive expansion?
What I'm getting from this list is that nobody likes Russia and they have no friends. Literally nobody cares about our annexation of 2/3rds of Russia. Good! There's no way any of them will come to regret this...
Peace is signed! Glory to Chavchuveny!
In a final act of humiliation, the Tsar is forced to sign the peace treaty in the burnt-down ashes of the Kremlin. The whole of Europe is ablaze with gossip about the great and mighty Chavchuveny. Once considered weak and feeble primitives, Chavchuvenians have come together to forge the greatest Empire the world has ever seen!
From the White Sea to the Pacific, the lands of the north are under the firm and brutal control of Chavchuveny. Victory columns march through the capital to the deafening cheers of a furious and victorious population. The dread Reindeer banner of Chavchuveny has been raised over Europe and nobody and nothing is left to stand against them. Twilight fades over the Russian empire and the world quivers in its boots at the sheer terror unleashed by Chavchuveny military might as three worlds are shouted by young and old like across the great empire. Glory to Chavchuveny!

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