Civ Hybrid Games Mk. IX - Part 11

Hullo, and welcome back to the ninth mark of the Civilization Hybrid Games! Somehow, I (/u/EndlessVoid0) slipped through the cracks and am now narrating. At least I'll be marginally more comprehensible than Aberystwyth.

Speaking of which, we open with a shot of the Union of Albion, up-and-comers fresh off building a temple and reuniting almost all of the isles. The Franks stubbornly hold on to the only parts of the isles that matter in real life, London and Canterbury, and after a Diplomacy-level stab on Supe's Artists Formerly Known As Soissons, appear to be in a good position to become a power here. Suparia looks especially juicy a target.

Yep. The Artists Formerly Known As Soissons' military appears to have up and vanished in the night. A wave of Ballistas might try to contest at some point, but those Frankish UUs have the border cities (Lutetia Parisiorum, Suparia, and Augustobona) in the palms of their hands. At least the red team has a big honkin' wall.

Hasn't slowed the Visigoths any. Darioritum looks set to become the most flipped city this mark, even with the Visigoth reinforcements consisting entirely of boats. Armorica stronk?

The Artist Formerly Known As Soissons, meanwhile, have elected to craft a military without any composite bowmen. Just cancel this part of France entirely.

It's like they took the nation of Gibraltar and translated it north.

Civil wars are just excuses for chaos. The orderly Visigoths look on in horror as the Trinitarian Rebels and Vandals go at it on sea and kinda barely on land, with their capitals next door to one another. Mauretania, meanwhile, is actually assembling something marginally terrifying.

And here we have West Rome! Or the sad, depressing excuse for it that yet remains. Ravenna and the Lombards still hold a split in half Italy, with Ravenna (basically Rome) taking the lead and yelling obscenities at Augusta Raricorum across the mountains.

Digi's Burgundy lurks across the Alps, ready to launch an assault on The Artist Formerly Known As Soissons with their knowledge of ranged warfare. (Never quite thought I'd consider Digi a threat to us, but here we are.)

Another part, another rumble in the Eastern Roman jungle between Rose and Tef. Tef's got the clear edge here - his units are inside Rose's borders, and he appears to have taken military advice from siege masters and siege masters alone.

Good God, so many ballistas. Even with Rome dead, their UU will live on for eternity.

Friendly reminder to Alans: submit next time. Look at all those horses! Attila didn't die for this.

Egypt status: stable.

Hahahahano Jesus Christ this is insane. We've got what may go down as the bloodiest naval battle of all history even if we give this world in a test tube two more millenia to sort things out. We've got confusing bordergore leading to a unique tactical situation. We've got Rome v. Egypt. We've got Taqn. Watch this space - the mark could swing on it.

One turn in, and Roman blood is once again leaking into the water. Frankish units scratch the sides of Suparia with their axes, while Burgundians charge at an exceedingly slow rate. Darioritum's not going to last the turn. At least the ballistae will arrive fast enough to pick up the pieces.

How does the Great Wall bonus even work in this context, anyways? Just one wall won't slow a unit down for all time. Is it multi-layered?

The inventively named Cul de Cossack flips immediately in the Vandal civil war. Bandy might want to begin thinking about a return voyage to Rome soon.

Egyptian combat, predictably, is a meat grinder. Around forty percent of the boats left standing outside Alexandria have taken some losses, as has the city itself. The Spears of the Round Table, to no one's surprise, are already almost extinct.

Armorica's a thorn in Colombia's side, now; Darioritum has fallen. Thanks to the glory of Roman roads and walls, Suparia isn't facing a similar fate - the Franks menacing the city have pretty much all been driven to half health, and with ballistae reinforcements arriving and the city not yet dented, it looks like this will be a slog for the Franks, if it amounts to anything at all.

The Burgundians, upon seeing actually competent coalitions, ran away out of sheer terror. I can't blame them.

Icosium falls... to Mauretania! Better start looking into full civ status soon, guys. Bandy has no units in position to retake the city, and he's probably justifiably more concerned with his fellow Vandals invading him than he is some lowly city-state.

Darioritum isn't a done deal, it seems. By my count, eleven ballistae could be on an effort to retake the city... and only two units capable of capturing it. Best AI in the game.

As for the Frankish front, nothing but murder going on right now. Ho hum.

The dust seems to be settling in Egypt, and on the naval front, there's a clear victor. Egypt has held off Rose's Rome with aplomb, and only one nigh-dead ship remains in Egyptian waters. Tef seizing a city with his other coalition isn't out of the question.

The Artists Formerly Known As Soissons are now down to just one nigh-dead military unit able to take the city, despite having almost completely wiped it out. Brilliant.

I'm sure Massilia is fine.

At least Bandy can keep Hippo Regius.

Meanwhile, Sicily finds itself once again menaced by marauding Africans. Rome's getting gifted land from a nation in civil war and is still somewhat vulnerable.

Well, nevermind then! A quick jump to the future, and Bandy's on the lonely boat ride back to Ravenna. We will remember the Trinitarian Vandals like we remember fireworks - some oohs and ahs, before immediately exploding into disparate parts and leaving no trace.

Sicily is unvandalized. Rome may as well just buy ten tons of cleaning supplies next shopping trip.

Rome's still at war with itself, surprising absolutely no one. It appears Ravenna has emerged as top of the post Western Rome food chain, however, as Pisae's at risk of falling.

Yep. Burgundy, in awe of the competence displayed all around them, huddles on the ground in a show of sadness.

Darioritum flips! Don't have to worry about Armorican revolts if there aren't any people in the city, I suppose. The Artists Formerly Known As Soissons have larger worries than the state of a singular province of fools, however. Augustoritum is not long for this world, and the ballista only strategy employed by the red team hasn't helped matters.

At least the Franks and Burgundians can't get anything to go either, stopped by a big ol' wall and being a sobbing heap on the ground, respectively.

st when you thought it was safe to go back in the Nile...

Because of the shortsighted nature of the Eastern Roman Rebel army (entirely comprised of a navy), Aelia Capitolina looks destined to go yellow. Cyrene's probably fine, what with Rose having seized control of the sea, but you can never know when facing a military largely comprising of war chariots.

Oh, those Geats.

Suddenly France is on the back foot in Gaul, as Rotomagus is assaulted by the legion of siege. But Augustoritum is also near falling, due to similar reasons. Let's just call the ballista-only technique a mixed bag and move on with our lives, aye?

And that's it for this part! We've seen high highs, low lows, and senseless massacres the Europe over. This has been your narrator, /u/EndlessVoid0, the between-characters plotwriting labor upon which nations are built off of, stepping aside for the slightly more interesting and far more relevant end-part slides.